Thoughts: "The Last Rite" by Lee Yu-Hwa

It is the classic old versus new thing. In post-revolution "modern" China, after the centuries-old dynastic empire has been overthrown at last, starts a story of a boy named Chou nan-an coming back home, after having been gone for college for three long years, to his ill-stricken grandmother. But as it turns out, his ill-stricken grandmother was not the only one he'd find himself coming back home to: a self-disappointing confrontation and "neglect of duty" discussion with his father, a completely unexpected turn-around by his sister, a surprising revelation to his unsurprised mother, and a long been waiting rite to pass, as dictated by his culture and tradition, supposed to be his last.

His father asked him what, after three years gone, he has learned in the modern school. He answered, in complete respect, how broad the knowledge being taught in the modern school is that it seems to him so complicated and difficult to simply explain outright. A master of retort, his father sneered at him, telling him there is nothing more complicated to learn and to explain if only what the modern school teaches boys like him is just how to live a life of a man; not a bunch of sciences and varied culture and all that crap. Then his father led the talk into raising an awful reminder the neglected duty his son has left in the house since he went away: the arranged marriage of Chou and his betrothed fiancee. This a duty, as the culture dictates, he owes gravely to his father, and a wish by his grandmother he quite traditionally needed to grant before she dies. 

His sister was excited for the coming of her soon to be sister-in-law; she shall finally have someone to talk to and sew with. Upon this, Chou was infuriated and completely taken aback. For long, he thought he could have his sister on his side and have counted her support in undertaking his new modern ways and ideals. He has duties and responsibilities only to himself as an individual, he claims during their conversation; and none to this fiancee of his but fake ones! He told his sister that her mind is poisoned for yielding and compromising to this culture. Moreover, he added that he does not wish to marry her, the fiancee, for she is not the type of girl that he would choose for himself to marry.

His mother told him not to tell his father anything of this until all the wedding is over. He had just told his mother that he is already married to another woman, a modern friend in college. It turned out, after this supposed to be shocking revelation to his mother that apparently didn't surprise her a bit, for she calmly replied to his son that a marriage, no matter when, where, or with whom, is not and never a marriage as long as the family had never arranged it. This just becomes something unrecognized by the whole family unless acted upon with destitution by the unauthorized-wedded wife to be just the second one to his groom. His woman, if she wishes to be recognized, has to beg to become the second wife if the arrange wedding pushes through! He thought, again, of how the family's morality bespeaks paradoxical ideals so loudly upon this discussion with his mother.  

Soon later, the wedding happened and was pushed through. The red sedan of the fiancee was brought to the house of Chou. The night came and both were inside the newly-wed chamber, as dictated by culture and tradition, in a part of the house. During that night, however drowned and clouded and hard his mind might be, after the many rounds of drinking he had with his cousins prior, during his long due thinking he has gotten beside that bed, as soon as the tears had started to fall down his bride's rogued cheeks, he exercised the rite. He exercised his rite.

Traditional Chinese family portrait

One of the many Confucian principles in Confucius's "The Analects" teaches that the father must be kind and the son be devotedly obedient, that the elder brother must be gentle and the younger be humble and respectful, that the husband must be righteous in behavior and the wife be obedient, that the elders must be humanely considerate and the juniors be deferential, that the rulers must be benevolent and the ministers and the subjects be loyal, so that the society be harmonious for all.

Well, that is quite a clear point, Confucius. Anyway,  you can read the whole story here.